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Renee's Random Rants and Raves

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No Strings Attached/Drama Free


Renee/Admin

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I realized I haven't posted a blog in a while, and not really sure what I'm going to write, but lately the concepts of "No Strings Attached" and "Drama Free" have been on my mind. I often see ads on the various hook-up sites where a person is looking for a No Strings Attached hook-up and claims that either they are Drama Free, or are looking for someone who is drama free.

I have always understood the concept of no strings attached as meaning that there is no further obligation in the encounter beyond the particular hook-up on that day, and if the participants enjoy each other enough, they may continue to hook up, but beyond the hook up there is no further necessity for planning for the future, obligations to go out to dinner or a movie, and certainly no financial obligation (Pay for play by definition means no strings attached after the payment and play). However, that being said, my experience is that many people who say 'No strings attached" often have certain unstated expectations, and in fact NSA, in my opinion, does not relieve one of the obligation of common courtesy, i.e. calling/texting if you are going to be late or a no-show; or letting an admirer know if you are hosting several guys, so they can decide to join or wait for one on one.  As in in all things, there is no such thing as a free lunch, most NSA interactions happen either at someones home or a motel. One should always be cognizant that you have been invited into someone's home for a round of fun sex, and you should treat that persons home with respect and courtesy, and when you finish, be kind...so many guys basically cum, wipe their dicks off on the curtains, and run out the door.  Although most girls will not invite those types back, many of these types of admirers wonder why they don't get a second shot, and it is because this unstated expectation of common courtesy is not met.

The concept of Drama Free is a whole different animal, but basically many people just want a hook-up to be a hook-up; they don't want know you lost your job, they don't want to hear your kids are flunking out of school, they don't want to hear your wife won't give you a blow job, and certainly they don't want to argue about why you didn't have time to see them last week.   Although most people have some interest in humanizing their play partners, and therefore conversations about personal matters are appropriate in "drama free" interactions, these conversations sometimes have a tendency to veer in the wrong directions and go south, if one of the participants happens to say the wrong response.  Secondly, unmet expectations are one of the biggest causes of drama.  For example, many people get upset if they have an interaction, and then send a follow up text, and the play partner doesn't respond.  A drama free person simply accepts that the other party is not in physical, emotional, or spiritual place to have further interaction, and leaves it alone.  Drama is created when the person texts a week later for a follow up hook-up and the party says "why didn't you respond to my text last week?"  Immediately, the non-responding party is put on the defensive, and a mini drama unfolds.  The secret to drama free is to have no expectation beyond having a good time on that day.

In short, NSA and Drama Free are two watch words people often post in ads, but if you respond to such ads, or post such ads, understand the rules, and you will have no limit to the number of NSA and Drama Free play partners knocking at your door.

All the best,

Renee

 

 

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Great post, Renee. I'm involved with this scene in part because of all the drama that comes with the regular "dating" world. I was on a dating app for a while, and everyone I met there had drama in some form... an agenda, issues with past partners, money problems (they wanted my money; that was a problem!), or had emotional needs that no mortal could ever meet. In other words, drama for days... and strings up the wazoo (disclaimer: please don't put strings up your wazoo, unless they are the kind with beads -- but I digress). Anyway, I prefer to keep my life simple these days, without the nut-job entanglements, which is why events like Temptation Tuesday are such a pleasure.

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